Portrait of Shalom – A Force to Calm the Chaos – Dallas Frisco Photographer – Me Ra Koh

This one is special…this one means everything to me. It was almost impossible to write, with a title wave of emotions hitting me at every turn. But this one.. this one deserves for the whole world to know her spirit. This is Shalom. She’s my very best friend for over thirty years, and I am honored to share her story with you.

THROWN INTO CHAOS

A year ago, we had our annual girls’ weekend. The three of us, me, Shalom, and Anna, will sit in our pjs all day. Talking about everything and anything, the way besties do. It’s often 3am when we realize we need to get some sleep! LOL

I’ll never forget Shalom telling us that she was going to get her annual physical in the next week. Her doctor suggested a routine colonoscopy since it hadn’t been done. Anna and I teased her, thankful we didn’t have to do our own in the next couple weeks.

And then the call came.

It’s incredible how one conversation, one short moment in time, can throw your entire life into complete chaos. Shalom was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colon Cancer. It was already in her lungs. She needed a miracle….my heart pauses remembering this call, all the tears and shock that followed. Cancer spreads, wreaking havoc from the inside out. The body is not the only thing affected. The mind, spirit and heart of everyone around you is also suffering from the disrupting, destructive effects of cancer.

A year later, we are celebrating!

Shalom recently hit her one year milestone of life after her devastating diagnosis. She and her daughter made a special trip from Seattle to Frisco a few months ago. I wanted her to see the RADIANT Shalom we all see so we did our Rising Phoenix Experience for her. So many prayers, an amazing oncologist, family and community in Bellingham, WA, have rallied around her. Shalom is still here, and she is more RADIANT than ever! The God of the impossible is ALIVE in her!

She has always been a source of complete peace and joy for her family and friends. Her name literally means ‘peace, wholeness and well-being’. She came into the world embodying the very qualities of her given name. There is a supernatural energy surrounding her that makes you feel calm, focused, inspired, confident and increasingly loved. She’s magnetic and always has been.

The complete dichotomy of being a source of peace for all around you then having your life turned upside down with a stage 4 cancer diagnosis is enough to sink anyone into a depression that would be impossible to claw your way out of. Yet something miraculous has come from this season for Shalom. She seemed to sink further into who she is and who God created her to be. She is a force to calm the chaos; all has settled and she is emerging like a breathtaking, powerful rising phoenix.

Beauty has come from the ashes.

She is a beacon of pure light that can only come from God.

HOPE DEPOSITED FUELS THE LIGHT OF LOVE

With one devastating diagnosis, all the ‘extra’ was suddenly stripped away. The silly things we worry over from day-to-day, the seemingly superfluous dreams and goals and thoughts seemed to fall to the wayside. Shalom describes this season as a time of cleansing. A time where her true, authentic self has been renewed, no longer bogged down by the unimportant stuff we all deal with daily. She has found herself so full of hope. Hope deposited through this journey. Shalom told me that she feels like she’s been given a new wardrobe, garments of hope and clarity to put on each day.

She describes her life ‘before and after cancer diagnosis’ as being like an abstract painting vs. realism. Shalom feels as though she is almost beaming, oozing with love. “I’m wearing hope so thickly. In a deep part of me, it has risen up to the surface.” The result of living with this kind of pure hope is a blinding love that shines brightly on everyone she encounters.

ADAPTABILITY IS SO POWERFUL

Also rising within her is the underestimated but ever-powerful ability to adapt. All of God’s creatures are created to adapt, some better than others. If they don’t develop adaptability, they don’t survive. This ability to adapt has been a blessing to Shalom in this season.

Some days she struggles. Several days she has no energy. Some days she deals with immense pain and other days she wakes up feeling like sunshine, ready to explore the wonders of life and love on her people. Being able to give herself grace flows through each day without expectation but with peace has made all the difference in this journey. She lives in the moment now and takes nothing for granted.

The consequence of hope is love. Shalom finds herself bursting with love for God, for her family, for her friends, for this planet we get to call home. She has truly fallen in love with life and wishes everyone could experience this clarity. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13

WHAT CHRIS LOVES ABOUT HIS WIFE

Chris is a man of few words. He’s an abstract painter that brings the Bible to life in the most profound paintings. This one is called “The Word Became Flesh”.

Even though he’s super quiet, when I called him to talk about Shalom, he had a collection of words to share.

He talked about how her name doesn’t just mean peace but “crushing that which leads to chaos.” It feels especially fitting given the journey she’s been on. Despite the turmoil in her physical body due to the tumors and chemo, Shalom has shown an incredible strength. She has taken ownership of her situation in a way that seems to embody the meaning of her name. Chris finds solace and pride in how she has embraced this battle, facing the chaos head-on with grace and determination.

One of the things Chris loves most about Shalom is her unique boldness. Early in her journey, she read the words of Jesus, which urge the importance of making peace with others before seeking healing. This message resonated deeply with her. It inspired her to confront people from her past who had caused her pain—something she wouldn’t have done before. Chris admires how Shalom has stepped out of her comfort zone to seek closure and reconciliation. She has demonstrated a courage that has only deepened his love for her.

RADIATING JOY AND SLAYING DRAGONS

Chris hopes these portraits will empower her to be the things she knows about herself – to take out a little more chaos today and bring a little more wonder into it, embracing each day. “Anybody can slay a dragon. Waking up every morning and loving the world again, that’s what takes a real hero.” (YES!! So many tears.)

THEY DON’T HAVE PHOTOS BUT PAINTINGS

Shalom’s home is like walking through an art gallery. Chris’s work taking your breath away, challenging you, pushing the limits of your imagination. It makes sense why they don’t have any photos on their walls.

She wasn’t sure about having a big portrait of herself on the wall. The bedroom felt like a safe place. But look at where Shalom’s Rising Phoenix artwork ended up. In the middle of their living room!

When Shalom told me how this gives to her, I cried. We both cried. How do you give to someone you love so much? Everything in you wants to make it better. I wanted to give her this Rising Phoenix Experience, but I knew she didn’t have a grid for it. Yet, we both reached deep within our very core, and created this together.

“I literally say hello to myself when I wake up and throughout the day. It helps me to remember to make space for me…and that I do possess strength and courage for each day.

Seeing my wall art every day is like a whole new discovery of myself that’s always been there. I feel like the woman in the photos is the Shalom everyone experiences. But as I walk through this cancer journey, I need to see her too. And I need her to speak to me.

At first, I wanted this in our bedroom, but I’m really glad it’s in the living room. I come around the kitchen, and she catches my eye throughout the day. She grounds me. Even though I feel really disoriented in life or really scared and alone, I see her there. And I feel this crazy shifting inside of me that is powerful. Each one (portrait) fits like a puzzle when before I only had one piece of the puzzle. Seeing my true self every day is remarkable.”

GRATITUDE FOR LIFE

Chris is also moved by Shalom’s profound gratitude for life. Despite the challenges they face daily, she remains grateful for the small things—the daily moments, the simple joys, and the friendships that surround them. Her appreciation for life, in all its forms, radiates a joy that Chris finds incredibly inspiring. Even in the face of such a difficult diagnosis, Shalom’s ability to find happiness in the little things fills their lives with hope and love, making her all the more remarkable in his eyes.

WHAT ENOCH LOVES ABOUT HIS MOM

Enoch shared how understanding his mom is. He loves that she truly listens when others share their ideas, making them feel heard and valued. Her ability to share her thoughts in a way that’s never intrusive, always subtle, makes her someone people love to talk to. Enoch often thinks her being a counselor is the perfect job because she’s such a good listener and genuinely cares about what others have to say.

“My mom is like a bright light on a dark background. She appears to shine brighter than everything around her and makes things and people around her bright as well.”

His mom has shaped who he is in so many ways. Enoch credits her with giving him his adventurous spirit and the positive energy that he tries to bring to others. He’s seen how she’s always a positive force in the lives of those around her, lifting them up with her optimism and understanding. For Enoch, his mom’s superpower is her ability to listen—she’s not just hearing words, but truly engaging with people, making them feel seen and understood.

WHAT SCARLET LOVES ABOUT HER MOM

Scarlet speaks with deep admiration for her mom, highlighting her favorite qualities: how her mom always looks out for others, her strong relationship with God, and her ability to have deep, meaningful conversations. Her mom’s laughter and joy are infectious, making her a bright light in the lives of everyone around her. Scarlet sees her mom’s superpower as always being there for others, offering unwavering support no matter what. This warmth and care have left a lasting impact on Scarlet, teaching her the importance of kindness and empathy.

Her mom has also shaped who Scarlet is today, helping her to be nonjudgmental and to embrace her own pace in life. Scarlet has learned that it’s okay to be different, and that taking her time is perfectly fine. They share a wonderful dynamic, filled with exploration, trying new things, and endless laughter. Scarlet wants her mom to know that chemo hasn’t changed her—instead, this process has only made her more of who she truly is. Their bond is stronger than ever, and Scarlet treasures every moment they spend together.

GIVING THE FAMILY A VOICE

As I did the calls with Chris and the kids, I realized something. Shalom and I have always joked that her family is one of few words and our family is crazy loud and never runs out of words. But her immediate family had so much to share. This journey was transforming all of them.

That’s when I realized how important it was to call her parents and siblings. They needed a voice in this as much as Shalom needed to see true self. I didn’t reach all of them, but so thankful for the ones we did connect with.

WHAT SHALOM’S PARENTS LOVE

Shalom’s mom shares how much she admires her daughter’s faithfulness. “She is faithful to the Lord and those around her. Her mom also loves Shalom’s perseverance and willingness to do whatever it takes to work toward healing, even if it’s difficult. She has a compassionate heart. In the middle of her own challenges, she still shows concern for people around her. Shalom has so much kindness and a gentle spirit that is clearly seen. She is, in turn, so deeply loved by so many people.” Her mom appreciates her joy and laughter so much! And Shalom’s superpower is her acceptance of all different types of people. People from all walks of life. “She’s so good at accepting them for who they are and where they are in life. We love this about Shalom!”

Shalom’s dad speaks on the significance of her name. He shared with us that he and his wife were coming to their last year in seminary when they found out they were excepting a baby. They weren’t ready for that yet! Somehow, the word shalom became so meaningful to them in that season. So they decided to name their little one Shalom. “The word means peace, wholeness and well-being. It’s a greeting to those who you are meeting and a prayer for those passing by,” said her dad. “By the time our baby came, we were ready to receive her. Shalom Maria is her full name. She is such a wonderful gift to us.”

WHAT BEN SEES RISING IN HIS SISTER

Shalom’s younger brother, Ben, sees that she is relentlessly joyful, infectiously helpful and a fierce protector and advocate for the vulnerable and marginalized. “Whenever I’ve been given a chance to talk with customers from Shalom’s days at Starbucks, they always remember her joy, smile, laughter and genuine care for who they are. She is always referred to as everyone’s favorite!” This brings everyone around her so much joy and fills them with inspiration. He believes her superpower is being a bringer of joy and laughter. She shifts the atmosphere and brings life. She is strong, an overcomer and beloved – period!

WHAT DEREK SEES RISING IN SHALOM

Her older brother, Derek, shares that it’s been amazing to see Shalom experience her faith in a new way through this season. “I see her lean on the strength of God. When we are weak, He is our strength. I see her humbling herself before God and recognizing that He loves her and cares for her even through this exhausting trial. I see Shalom drawing lines and boundaries around her family, Chris and her children. She is able to determine her center relationships, and then the next ring of people. When it gets really hard, she has the strength to establish boundaries so she can survive the hardest of times.”

He also shares how Shalom loves others well. Even in her pain and weakness, she has loved well. She lives out her name by bringing the love and peace and joy of God into the lives of others. Shalom loves and accepts others. People desperately need someone to accept and love them. She demonstrates this day after day.

“God chooses to work through the people of this earth to show His love,” said Derek. “You, Shalom, are a vessel of God’s love. You first, receive His love and second, share it with someone who needs it today.”

WHAT CHARISSA SEES RISING IN HER SISTER

The top 3 things Charissa sees rising in Shalom in this season is – she has the most strength ever! She is resilient in both strength and weakness. And she is steady. She shares that Shalom, out of everyone in her family, has always worked hard to be patient with her and include her. She makes it not only possible for Charissa to be a part of things, but she infuses her with strength.

“Shalom is a jewel and a prize to us. After she got cancer, for her to know no matter what she decides to do or not do, we just love her. She is ALWAYS our jewel and prize. Her strength is stronger than anything. Her spirit is so much bigger than her body.”

WHAT ANNA SEES RISING IN OUR FRIEND

We had to call our other bestie. Anna loves how deep Shalom is. She’s never shied away from the deep places. She’s drawn to the deep. Shalom shows up and chooses to be with you, wherever you are. This also makes her have interesting friendships! She has abundance of joy that easy, free, deep resounding laugh. You can always laugh with her! “Shalom’s solidarity is unique. It’s hard to describe, but if realness can be a physical quality, she’s more real than real can be. There’s solidarity about her that is so real! She is a bright and beautiful light. She’s a clear light after a rain, like a rainbow light.”

“When I went through my divorce, she took the time to come see me. We met halfway. We sat in the middle of the bridge of the waterway on the rock, overlooking the cliff, and talked for hours. She was the solid rock in the middle of the water for me. I don’t know anybody that doesn’t feel more themselves than when they’re with her. She helps people be true to who they are. I want these portraits to reminder her of her brightness. I hope she sees what an extraordinary light she is. Like the image in Revelations about the streets of pure gold that is ‘crystal clear’. It’s the striking brightness of who she is.”

DURING THE PHOTO SHOOT…

There was this moment during the photo shoot, when all the nervousness was finally gone. Shalom sat on the stool, looked at me, smiled and said “Me Ra.”

I took the shot.

And then we both started crying.

Shalom has always seen me and loved me for who I am. And I see her and love her.

Somehow I just knew this portrait was going to go deep. THIS is the Shalom we all experience. Those are the eyes of love that make every person feel so genuinely loved and accepted. It doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from, that is the look of love that Shalom will give you. And it impacts you on such a heart level. It’s what makes the whole town throw an auction to raise money for her chemo treatments, or a local putting up a billboard even to support her.

How powerful to experience being seen by someone and then fully loved. That is her superpower.

Shalom has been this for everyone all her life.

Now she gets to be there for herself.

And what a mystery, a remarkable mystery, it is to give this to yourself. How it causes “a crazy shifting inside of you.”

WALKING THROUGH THE SHADOW OF THE VALLEY OF DEATH

Over the last year, we’ve cried countless times over the phone. In the morning, my family will hear me ROARING in my office with prayers for her miraculous, complete healing. I see us growing old together, enjoying our grandchildren together someday.

We talked one day about the things you plant in the valley of the shadow of death. How the soil is unlike anywhere else. The richness of it comes at great cost. But what you plant in the valley grows for the rest of your days. Feeding you truth, hope, and wisdom that you never found anywhere else.

We’re feasting on the fruit already! We’re believing for more miraculous days and years ahead.

And we are experiencing our mourning turning into dancing.

I love you, Shalom, with everything in me.

You and Anna, our sisterhood, is of my most treasured gifts.

IS YOUR LOVED ONE GOING THROUGH CANCER?

Is your loved one going through cancer or another serious illness? Are you battling one yourself?

It would be a honor to give you our Rising Phoenix Experience.

We will call your loved ones and ask them what they love most about you. Our FIORIA team has in-depth training on asking life giving, guided questions. Clients often tell us the calls are healing. They give loved ones an opportunity to share what they sometimes struggle to find the words for.

I don’t think any spouse is as quiet a person as Shalom’s husband. 🙂 But we’re not calling just to ask generic questions. Our heart is to create and hold space for your loved one to reflect on what is most meaningful to them.

MEET OTHER RISING PHOENIXES WHO ARE OVERCOMING ILLNESS

Mark is a single dad who was diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer. A good friend of the family got a gift certificate for him and his teenage daughter to have their own Rising Phoenix Experience.

CLICK HERE to see their story.

Linda overcame breast cancer and is UNSTOPPABLE! She RADIATES joy!

CLICK HERE to see part of her story on my instagram.

Taryn is a transplant survivor! She flew in from Colorado to see herself healthy on the other side of years of being sick.

CLICK HERE to see her beautiful Rising Phoenix story!

CALL OR TEXT OUR STUDIO TODAY

Our team is excited to work with you and your family. You can text or call our studio at 469-364-2450.