Portrait of Unconditional Love as a Caregiver – Dallas Frisco Branding Photographer – Me Ra Koh
Meet Patty…one of the most POWERFUL Rising Phoenixes to date. Her story exudes strength, humility, unconditional love and the very best of humanity. Patty is a wife, mother and full-time caregiver to son, Leyton, who suffered a traumatic brain injury (TBI). Patty lives for everyone else always, so when her husband, Kip, called us up to set up her Rising Phoenix experience, we felt so honored! We wanted to not only tell her story but celebrate her and her spirit in a way that honors her God-given gifts and showers her with the love she so freely gives to all who surround her.
PATTY WASN’T AS EXCITED AS KIP
Patty had a lot of reservations about doing this experience. The idea of being photographed didn’t sound inviting! LOL She also expressed how they’ve never had successful family photos due to Leyton’s brain injury and needs. Being able to serve a family with disabilities, meeting them exactly where they are at is everything. There is a special note to you at the end of this blog. When the family member with a disability opens up to us because they feel safe, showing us their heart, it takes my breath away. Leyton took all our breaths away!
Patty posted a Google review after their beautiful wall art was installed. Our whole team felt so proud of every word!
My husband surprised me with a family photo shoot with FIORIA. I didn’t know much about it going in and I was pretty nervous. The nervousness went away within minutes! What a beautiful experience! Brian and Me Ra are delightful, professional and beyond creative. The process was so much fun! The end product is beyond amazing. The wall art is stunning and captured our family perfectly. I can’t say enough great things.Thank you Brian and Me Ra for a great family memory. -Patty
Sometimes when we help our kids rise, they end up activating the Rising Phoenix within us.
This is Patty’s Rising Phoenix story.
A SUPERNATURAL LOVE FOR OTHERS
When you’re young and in love and starting a family, you never imagine how one event can change the course of the path you’ve set for yourself. You never imagine the heartache, challenges and constant fight you enter into when you take up armor on behalf of your child. Patty and Kip have a fierceness and steadfastness that cannot be taught, only bestowed by God when you walkout hardships you never could have prepared for.
I’ll never forget the day Kip Bradley called me. He was on vacation with his wife, Patty, and snuck away to book a Rising Phoenix Experience for her. When I started asking him what he loves most about his wife, what he sees rising in her, Kip started weeping. Their son, Leyton, suffered a severe brain injury at birth, and ever since then Patty has been his full time caregiver, physical therapist, teacher… the list goes on and on. Patty worked daily with her son and helped him succeed in ways that are not easily achievable with a disability, including getting accepted into an amazing program at the University of Arkansas!
With a limited number of student volunteers, only a small amount of disabled students are accepted into the program each year to experience attending college! Thanks to Patty’s determination and unwavering faith, Leyton is now a freshman at University of Arkansas and thriving in his program! When Kip called me, this was the FIRST vacation they’d been on alone since their son, now 18 years old, was a baby.
Kip wanted to celebrate his wife’s resilience and the special bond she shares with their son. We are so grateful he called, and we had the opportunity to do this for Patty!
WHAT KIP LOVES ABOUT PATTY
Unconditional Love.
Unconditional Kindness.
Unconditional Willingness.
Unconditional Forbearance.
Unconditional Advocacy.
Unconditional Patience.
Unconditional Giving.
“Patty is a fighter! She has fought for our son at every turn and continues to fight for what she believes in! She’s a freaking SAINT!”, Kips said through a well of tears.
Patty is a special human. She is proactive, thoughtful, educated and advocates in a way that inspires everyone around her to step up. Every day she made a special smoothie for Leyton with specific nutrients in it for neuropathy support. She manages medicine for a seizure disorder and spent 5 years homeschooling Leyton with 8-10 hours a day of physical therapy. Leyton would belly-crawl 100 yards each day (military style), go back and forth on monkey bars in his bedroom 10 times a day. He would do breathing exercises 60 times a day, including specific exercises that create new neuro-pathways in the brain. Patty used flashcards to teach him how to read and now he reads like a champ! For 18 years she devoted her life to setting Leyton up for future success. This now includes college, something most never thought possible.
A PERFECT EXAMPLE OF LOVING OTHERS WELL
When we asked Kip what he hopes Patty sees when she’s looking at her portraits, his emotions were raw as he talked about Patty’s selflessness.
“I want her to see her countenance. She has AMAZING patience! Patty has her hard days but her spirit remains so positive through everything. She has me and I have her – I want her to SEE that! Her daughters always say she’s selfless based on the way that she lays everything down for Leyton. But I’m not sure she embraces how well she has loved him and us. We all want to lift her up and say, ‘LOOK at what you’ve done! If it weren’t for you, Leyton would be sitting at home watching Sponge Bob.'”
Kip hopes these portraits remind Patty of how well she loves others. She spends so much time on her knees praying for others. “I want her to see these and be reminded that she raised up our children to be caring, kind, God-fearing and LOVING people and though one took a heck of a lot more work than we expected, WE DID IT!”
WHAT HER DAUGHTERS LOVE ABOUT HER
Nicoletta and Gabrielle joined us for their mom’s portraits and shared with us how much their mother has shown them what it means to love and love well. Nicoletta describes her mother as persistent, determined, selfless, sacrificial, a defender, warrior and protector! She says Patty ‘takes hits’ for her kids, especially Leyton. Any time someone would make fun of him or reject him, she would step in front of him to protect him. She would take the brunt of the negativity to protect her son from experience how awful some people can be. She would do everything in her power to make sure that he was loved! Patty went above and beyond to fight for her son. She would spend hours on the computer finding the best solutions to the multitude of challenges he has faced in his life.
Nicoletta says, “She’s Christ-like. She is a safe place for Leyton that makes him feel seen, heard and included. He doesn’t need to do anything other than be Leyton, and that is so beautiful.” She shared with us that at the dinner table, they will all be engaged in conversation and Leyton will blurt out randomly, “I saw an alligator. I saw a lizard today!” And while everyone else will be thinking, “What the heck, Leyton?” Mom will respond calmly, “Leyton, I want to hear about this lizard, we all do, but let’s finish this conversation first.”
DEFENDER OF THE DEFENSELESS
There is an overarching theme that emerged when we talked to Patty’s friends and family.. She is never ‘about Patty’. Nicoletta shares that she feels like ‘selfless’ is not a powerful enough word to describe her – She is sacrificial. She is a Super Woman – a Defender of the Defenseless!
“She’s the first one to see what you need and is so humble that she will not draw attention to herself. Even though we feel like she SHOULD have all the attention because of how amazing she is. She’s the greatest friend to everyone. Anyone who encounters her is forever changed. I know that when she walks into heaven, they will say, ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant’. Because she’s honestly the closest person I know to Jesus this side of eternity.” I don’t think as Christians, we could aim for higher praise from those we love!
THE STRONGEST ADVOCATE
Gabriella listed her top 3 qualities for her mom as an incredible advocate, resilient and so caring. We asked her what she would say is her mother’s superpower and she said, “She is the ultimate Mama Bear, especially to Leyton. You don’t want to mess with her cubs! She is a protector.. the mom that provides so much love and care. Her caring spirit is extended to everyone around her. She loves to love on you.”
We asked Gabriella how her mom has shaped her and she said, “I want to be like my mom. She creates an atmosphere of JOY. She lets you feel like yourself and allows you to speak your mind. She’s all about celebration and bringing people together! Patty will give everyone personal attention. She is phenomenal at creating a true ‘home’ – a place where you can feel safe to be yourself, with little personal touches that make you feel the peace and joy she works so hard to create.”
A SPIRIT OF SELFLESSNESS
Both of her daughters talk about how maternal, selfless and resilient their mother is. Patty has this kind of controlled power that exudes meekness and the gentle power of Christ. She’s incredibly resilient and so much more POWERFUL than she could ever imagine. “Even though her whole world has kind of revolved around Leyton, she still shows up for everyone in her life and makes us feel important. She wants everyone to come as they are and she will have a seat at her table for you, always. I feel like everyone is their best self around mom because she brings out the best in everyone. You can be vulnerable and raw with her and just know she truly accepts you for who you are.”
Isn’t that what we’re all wanting out of relationships in life? To be able to show up exactly as God made us and flawed as humans and still be seen and loved for who we are. Wow, we cannot imagine how powerful it is to be surrounded by that kind of energy and love on a regular basis. No wonder Patty’s husband and girls gush about her selflessness and loving spirit.
She is the ultimate caregiver and we are forever thankful for the caregivers in our life who help us become the best versions of ourselves! It’s easy to overlook the needs of our caregivers. We absolutely LOVE that Kip and their daughters want Patty to know that they see and appreciate everything she does for them, their family and everyone around her.
WHAT PATTY’S FRIENDS LOVE ABOUT HER
We also had the opportunity to speak with Patty’s friends, Lana, Cheryl and Diana. All three described Patty as strong, determined, filled with joy and hope, generous, kind, faithful and irreplaceable.
Lana’s son also has a TBI and she and Patty have been able to encourage each other through years of challenges for both of their sons. Together, they fought hard to clear a path for their boys. Where most would see roadblocks and turn back, Lana and Patty saw opportunities to create new pathways that ensured progress and health as they navigated life with their disabled sons.
HER FRIENDS AGREE – FAITH IS HER SUPERPOWER
Cheryl shares with us how Patty is a deep woman of faith and her faith is Christ-like. She strives daily to become more like Christ in who she is and how she treats people, and her efforts are felt by everyone she encounters. This is where her strength comes from to endure the really difficult things.
Cheryl says, “I also believe this is why so many people are drawn to her and love her. Because of how Jesus shines through all she does. She is loving and sacrificial in this way. I hope these portraits reminder her of this and how dearly loved and deeply appreciated she is.”
MATERNAL ENERGY
We love how Patty’s maternal spirit is felt not only with her own kiddos but with her friends’ kids. Patty fights for Lana’s son in much the same way she fights for Leyton. She is a second-mother to Cheryl’s children and a safe place for them to run to. In fact, she even went to Cheryl’s daughter’s sorority Mother-Daughter weekend when Cheryl was unable to attend. 4 days of breakfast, lunch, dinner and all the activities that came with the extended weekends. She also watched Cheryl son when she had to go out of town and he came down with a stomach flu and Patty babysat a ‘barfing, feverish broken son’ that wasn’t her own!! Cheryl doesn’t know how Patty does it. We don’t either, Cheryl, but what a friend!!
Diana describes Patty in much the same way as her family: consistently, she is a woman of deep faith who stands firm on the Word of God, is always encouraging, completely dependable, steadfast, faithful and truly a woman of beauty of grace, regardless of what’s thrown at her. Diana says Patty has faced great disappointment while trying to get Leyton into college.. there were many letters of rejection. She’s had her fair share of heartache, but somehow she doesn’t collapse under the weight of it all. She comes out stronger than ever, with more to give. “She’s absolutely beautiful, from the inside out, and one of the strongest women I know. She is so filled with joy and you can feel at ease and calm just being in her presence. Patty is a gift! I hope she remembers that the joy of the Lord is her strength.”
CREATING A TRUE HOME
Patty loves that her family genuinely enjoys being with each other. “We WANT to be together. We’ve worked hard to develop a true home – a place our children will want to be. The girls have sacrificed a lot with Leyton, but they see the benefits vs being resentful.”
A SPECIAL BOND BETWEEN MOTHER AND SON
We asked Patty what she loves most about her relationship with Leyton. She said she loves how relaxed and easy their bond has been over the years. It’s FUN! Their relationship is real and honest. “Leyton is so ‘in the moment’. This makes it easy. He’s consistently upbeat and joyful, even with all the hard work.
We couldn’t have done what we did without the happy-go-lucky spirit he has.” Patty says Leyton’s eyes are magical! They are full of pure joy. You never have to guess with him. You will always know how he’s feeling. He teaches everyone to be in the moment.
RISING WITHIN HER
Patty sees determination rising within her. She refuses to stop. If something isn’t working, she goes back to the ‘drawing board’, regarding Leyton’s needs. She also finds rising within her a care and love of people. Patty’s background is in child development and counseling. In this next season she will be pursuing work with young moms to help them navigate life as parents. The biggest thing rising within her? Passion! Patty is so passionate about her family, advocacy and fighting for others.
We hope that these portraits will truly remind Patty every day what she is capable of. She is hoping they will be a source of motivation. Likewise, we hope they will remind her she CAN make a difference and she DOES on a daily basis!
Patty, you are every amazing thing your family and friends say about you. AND MORE. Caregivers make the world function. YOU are the perfect example of loving others well. Thank you for letting us share your story!
SERVING FAMILIES WITH DISABILITIES
Over the last 20+ years, I’ve had the honor of photographing several families with disabilities. I’ll never forget filming an episode for Oprah’s interior designer, Nate Berkus. The producers had chosen a family to do a surprise remodel for and wanted me to come take family portraits to decorate with (while giving viewers photo tips). We were just outside of New York, pulled up at this family’s home with a film crew, and I found the mom in the kitchen crying. She told me their son was on the spectrum, and they’d never been able to capture a photo of him looking at the camera. And now we were going to do it on TV for millions of people?
Every time a mom trusts me with one of their kids or their own disability, it is the greatest gift.
That little boy SHINED that day. You can watch the first episode of us filming it here.
I made the whole experience a game for their son. It was an unforgettable family and experience!
Watch the heart moving, warming reaction the family has of the results in the second episode below.
MEET ISABELLA
Little Isabella’s Rising Phoenix story is another one of my favorites! We ALL witnessed a miracle that day! Read her family’s story by CLICKING HERE.
MEET AMANDA
One of my favorite moms ever is Amanda. She is a single mom in a wheelchair. When we did her Rising Phoenix Experience, she burst into tears and said it was the first time she didn’t see the wheelchair in her photos. Now she’s a part of our FIORIA team! We don’t know what we’d do without her! CLICK HERE to see her Rising Phoenix Experience with her daughter.
If you’re a family with disabilities that has never had a successful photo shoot, I’d be honored if you’d give me and my team a chance. There are specific things we do to set your family up for success. We hold space for all the ways that make your family so unique, special, and most of all, RESILIENT. You are a FAMILY of Rising Phoenixes! And there is nothing like seeing your family’s joy and resilience every day to renew your spirit.
CLICK HERE to fill out our Contact Form. I look forward to meeting you and hearing more of your story.
still we rise,
Me Ra
Ma Ra Koh,
… beau ti ful, is what shown in everything you touch. Thanks for allowing me the opportunity to see Beauty through your eyes.
Patty, what an honor to be PATTY!!! ‘Life’ has been ‘life’, but you have taking ‘life’ and told it what you want it to do.
Ms Shirlynn, you are the BEST!!! Thank you for writing these beautiful words! They are a gift to me and Patty! Appreciate YOU so much! Sending you a BIG hug! xoxo Me Ra